Bridal Shower Blues

I've joined the ranks of super-humans who've planned and survived...nay, triumphed over their first Bridal Shower. Despite the chaotic nature of the beast that is party planning, I'm thrilled with how it turned out and secretly enjoyed most of it.

Here's a rough guideline that will help keep your wallet and sanity from bankruptcy!

Start. NOW. Find out who else will be involved, settle on a theme/color scheme and do a quick run-through of possible venues. Classic bridal showers are women-only, ultra femme affairs that frequently match the bride's vision for her wedding. Our picnic luncheon was no exception; we stuck to breezy whites, burlap and twine with lots of gold and dark red details to reflect next month's rustic ceremony.

Of course, you can plan a shower based on the bride's favorite color, book, movie, pastime or food (I'm partial to a Taco Themed Party, myself). You can even make it a co-ed celebration. Choose your theme and stick with it!

Guest List. You don't have to send the invite out until closer to the event (we did it a month in advance), but you need an idea of how big your venue should be and how many mouths you need to feed. Make sure you give all your guests a heads up so they know to save the date! I used Evite.com to send out my invites: choose a beautiful template, add a message and link a gift registry and just wait while guests RSVP and leave comments. It even reminded us a few days before the shower that we had a commitment.

It can be a feat putting together the perfect guest list; you don't want to step on any toes or leave anyone out. Try to include fun, outgoing people who will participate in games and be friendly to the other guests.When in doubt, ask the Bride. Like Pam Beesly said, "It's my wedding, and I don't want anyone there who has called me a hussy."

Book the Venue. I emailed restaurants, halls, museums...I even bugged a few Airbnb hosts. Ultimately, the most cost effective option was to have it in a park. In NYC, most parks do not require a permit for parties of less than 20 people, but if you want to reserve a specific area it's a good idea to invest in one. Westchester County, where we held our shower, is a great option but keep in mind you will need a resident to apply for a permit. When choosing a venue, remember to factor in traveling and weather issues. Like many of my borough-based friends, I do not drive (MTA, baby), so arranging carpools was a must. We lucked out with a sunny morning, but we did get some light rain in the afternoon. If you don't want to worry about weather at all, definitely book an indoor venue. Thankfully, the men in our lives were able to erect a makeshift tent for out of PVC pipes and a huge white tarp. Amazon, you the real MVP.

Plan the Menu. Menus generally match the theme, i.e. tea sandwiches for tea parties, burgers and hot dogs for barbecues, tacos for a taco party. You can even buy a ton of items off of Mcdonalds' dollar menu and set them out on pretty platters! Which was my brilliant idea, unanimously shut down by my much classier relatives. Guests are usually happy to bring a dish, so if you're feeling overwhelmed, ask for help! My mom's friends, one of whom is enviously married to an amazing chef, brought plenty of delicious food. Make sure to take into account any guests who have allergies and those who follow a vegan, vegetarian, gluten-free or pescetarian lifestyle. I baked my sister's adorable mini naked cake and got rave reviews on these rice krispies. We added recipes to a few of the Thank You cards: hand-written and personalized notes are always most appreciated.

Games & Activities. Games are a great way to get everyone involved in the shower. Pinterest is a treasure trove of ideas, templates and printables. I warmed everyone up with individual games like Who Has The Groom? and Purse Scavenger Hunt, working my way up to group activities. You don't need too many games as the guests will be busy eating, drinking and fawning over the bride. Plan out how many participants will be in each game and which prizes to give the respective winners. 

I wanted the prizes to be something cute and unique, so I nixed mini lotions and found unique alternatives for good prices. If you're a fellow New Yorker, here are some places you can check out:

Flying Tiger: Think an entire store full of Ikea knickknacks. I bought a few of their $2 purses and stuck a $1 scratch off inside. Bam! For richer or poorer, baby. 920 Broadway, New York, NY 10010 

Dollar Tree: Everything is a dollar. Everything. Everything. 806 Pelham Parkway 
Pelham Manor NY, 10803

E.L.F. Cheap makeup and accessories of good quality. $1 section is a must for giveaways :) 741 Broadway New York, NY 10003

I stalked sales at Walgreens (Wet n Wild lipsticks and nail polishes, 3 for $2!), Victoria Secret, Bath & Bodyworks and Forever 21.

Keep in mind that not everyone is going to want to participate in games, so have other activities for them to do. We had a "Kisses for the Mrs." station where we provided paper, lipstick and pens for the guests to kiss and sign. The kisses were framed and presented to the bride as a guestbook/keepsake. We also hung a few 3D gold and white stars for a photo station and left out a little jar of paper for date night ideas.

Details. Heart sparklers, giant balloons, lace and burlap, hand painted wooden gift tags and hand printed bunting banners, specially curated playlists, DIY cake stands, golden hair clips and flower crowns, a mimosa bar for the lushes and Martinellis for the more conservative ladies...these are the things that everyone will notice and remember. Check to see if the groom is free to bring the bride a bouquet at the end of the party. Make the day as magical as you can for the bride and the guests. Keep costs low by doing research and asking Bridal Shower veterans for tips.

My friend told me about a fantastic flower vendor on the corner of Broadway and 17th and I got all the gorgeous blooms for the table for $20!

Also, everyone loves a homemade penis piñata. Just saying.

Don't sweat the small stuff. Do as much as you can before the day of the shower to alleviate stress and eliminate rush, but don't be so hard on yourself if things don't go as planned.
Did guests forget to comply to the dress code? Are the bees having their way with the desserts? Forgot to bring a bat to beat the piñata? (We smashed it against a tree hahaha) Take a deep breath and look around you: everyone is having a great time, so don't forget to have fun too! If the bride is smiling, you've done your job :)